It’s Not Personal: The Modern Woman’s Go-To Anthology on Relationships and Self-Love

It’s Not Personal is the modern voice of female feelings in dating, sex and relationships shared via Instagram, Facebook, a monthly column with BUST magazine and events and workshops in New York. Founded by Brooklyn-based Sara Radin and Vanessa Gattinella, the project is creating an inclusive safe space, absent of judgment, to share thoughts and feelings on the modern woman’s experience of heartbreak and healing.



The project came to be in January 2016 as Sara had realised the healing power of words when writing a poem post break-up. It’s Not Personal therefore offers women to take part in experiencing and contributing to a wording of the many alternative mindsets one goes through during a time of self-care and reflection. Respectively, the project focuses on the self rather than the partner to encourage women to use the tool of art and words to build themselves. This experience can be viewed online through their social media platforms or through in-person workshops, such as their most recent event in New York, titled ‘Let Yourself Flow’, which combined writing and dance in reflection of what to leave behind in 2017 before dancing into 2018.

Moreover, the project’s social media presence brilliantly counteracts the feelings of loneliness and inferiority that the ‘highlight reel’ of Instagram often creates.  And so instead of viewing an unrealistic depiction of womanhood, those interacting with It’s Not Personal are given authentic voices that strike true with what the modern day woman may feel. In an interview with Nasty Gal, founders Sara and Vanessa explain that Its Not Personal aims to “challenge the rituals of today’s modern romance and create safe, judgment free spaces for women/womxn to share their dating experiences using the healing tools of art and writing.”  It’s clear then that It’s Not Personal is here to challenge the thoughts of how women in heartbreak should feel, or should act, and instead portray what we truly think.



One of the many strengths of It’s Not Personal is that it expresses the thoughts and feelings that you experience as a female identifying person today, but, had never seen collectively displayed in a personal social media format. From quotes that will have you smirking at your phone screen to words that express deep-rooted feelings you haven’t yet mustered up the courage to form into words yourself, the It’s Not Personal project offers a cathartic thumb-scrolling experience for all women/womxn.

Follow the It’s Not Personal project here.